Funeral photography...?

[steevdavis62]

This is something i had never really given much thought until i was recently asked to take photos at the memorial service of my mate. During the service i felt almost disrespectful, and perhaps even rude. I felt like to people, it would appear like i was in some way trying to make money out of the death of my friend. While really i was trying to capture the moment, as a fitting tribute to the passing of a great mate. I also found the noise of my dslr really loud, when everyone else was quite. Perhaps i was just being paranoid, but has anyone else experienced something similar?

How you handle a situation like this? Is there a correct ettiquete, so as not to appear disrespectful?

[zespri]

I have to be honest, IMO there is no place at a funeral for photographers at all. I suppose it's different for everyone, but having someone take photos of me while I'm trying to hold myself together would offend me. It's a private moment that you're sharing with your friends and family, sure, but I would feel very much like my privacy was being invaded if someone was documenting it in this way.

Please don't think I'm having a go at you personally, you've already stated that you were asked to take the photos, so you weren't exactly popping out from behind corners or anything invasive. I guess I'm just putting an opinion out there in case your question was because you were thinking of offering it as a professional service.

That's just my 10c anyway, sorry I don't have any suggestions on ettiquite for you.

[KathrynWilson]

I know people do ask for it from time to time, but I can totally imagine your dilemma. I would think most at the service would probably be wondering what on earth was happening. I don't think there's much you can do other than to try and appear as professional as possible, and making sure you're not too intrusive. But at the end of the day if you are asked by the family to do it, then you are capturing moments for them that are in some way going to help them, so you just have to keep that in mind and try not to upset anyone else! Definitely a hard one, but good on you for doing it for them anyhow.

[ttosifa]

When my parents passed away at different times, someone had the foresight to take pictures before the memorial service and at the gathering afterward. No one took pictures during the service itself. The pictures are invaluable in that I have pictures of relatives, friends, and colleagues together showing their love and support. Some pictures included family members who never otherwise speak because of petty feuds but who kindly put aside their differences for one day.

As with zespri, I would have been offended if someone had tried to capture the "moment" of my grief. But I think there are other moments outside the service itself in which photos would be welcomed and encouraged.

[steelese]

At my wife's grandfather's funeral I was asked to take some photos. I felt really disrespectful, but I think there are times when you can take the picture and not disturb anyone. If you can take a picture at the viewing before anyone arrives, I think that's fine. Pictures of the pallbearers can be done without people noticing too much. If it is a military funeral like the one I did, then the color guard is good as well.

What I learned. Take the pictures when no one is around. During the events that need to be captured when people are there, use a telephoto lens, and stay far enough away that no one really notices you. If you are requested to, take pictures during the service from the back, quietly, and remember, no flash.

In retrospect, none of the pictures do much for anyone. As my wife says, it's not him, it doesn't look like him anymore. So if asked again, I would politely refuse, and explain why.

[shutterbug_wannabe]

I have taken some photos during the graveside portion of an uncles funeral. He was a veteran, a receiptent of the purple heart and so on and the honor guard was there and they had a gun salute. It was very moving and the photos where especially intimate. I gave them to my cousins (his sons) and my aunt and they were very grateful. I used my 300mm and stood quite a ways back from the proceedings as to not ruin the moment.

[SJH Foto]

I think you're misunderstanding. (or I am)

I have been asked to take pictures of the body before, so I assume this is what you mean. Not of the grieving family members

[steevdavis62]

SJH photo. I was asked to take photos at the funeral service. Of the whole service, and part of that was photos that portray the family's emotion.

Being a small university campus, i knew the bloke well and and alot of the people there well. It made me feel even worse the be 'commeri******ing'. I just hope people interpret my photos more as an attempt to 'immortalise' him.

[Kungpao]

My father, of all people to do so. Took some pictures at his own mother's funeral last week. Him, my mom, my brother, and I live here in the US and my grandmother that passed was living in the Philippines. Naturally, the funeral was there. My brother and I could not make it to the funeral so the pictures that we did see of the services (not the body) made me feel at least some form of closure. To me, pictures, before and after the actual services are ok, and if pictures during the service is requested, I agree with whomever posted no flash and distance with a tele.

[lputman]

When we had a first service for my father, we took pictures ourselves...We did not have the body and we had set up photo story boards and other precious pictures. We, my sisters and myself, took pictures. Since we all live spread out throughout the country, we had a group photo of the siblings...later, at the burial, my father had a burial guard, he was a WWII vet and my sister took photos at this occassion.

You were asked to provide a service, I'm assuming by family members of your mate...don't worry what other people think about it!