My second attempt at strobe lighting!

[Brookeabee123]

So you may have seen my last try at strobe lighting! Lol Well this is my second try! Now I really went for some intense shadows in this one! I love this picture! I like how moody it is and the lines. The rumpling of her undershirt bothers me and the fact that I cant get perfectly crisp photos drives me nuts, but I can live with it for now until I get a better camera and glass. But what do you guys think of it? I always like my photos more than I really should so please be completely brutal! My goal is to become amazing and I will never get that way if people never tell me what they really think lol



Camera Nikon D3100
Exposure 0.017 sec (1/60)
Aperture f/5.0
Focal Length 35 mm
ISO Speed 100

I had my photography mentor with me acting as my VAL (Voice Activated Light-stand ) so he was adjusting my light for me so I can't remember what I had him set it at! But I think it was 1/8th power!

So after checking out my EXIF data I noticed that I was shooting at 1/60 so

[maria fernanda]

i think it worked out nicely as a spotlight! not digging the model posture though, feels awkward.

[JFSanders]

OK, you said to be brutal but I will be honest instead. If that turns out brutally honest...

Lighting is ok, not dramatic nor flat but not POPPING. She doesn't pop from the background.

She is in the wrong composition. You centered the beams like they are the central element. But her face, which is what humans will key on, is lost over and up out of the scene almost. Her shirt and boobs being very light in a dark scene get a lot of attention right off the bat when you look at the image. As nice as they are I don't think that is what you were going for. The wrinkles don't bother me as much as the composition does. But the kill is her face being in the least desirable spot in that composition.

The beam at the top is crooked not level and having a highlight there is a boo boo. This image would be better with some editing to crop out distracting elements.

Overall suggestion, get in tighter, make your shadows less chunky at the edges, go for smooth shadows that get dark if you want dramatic and edgy images. I know there are people out there doing the harsh shadow thing, but that doesn't make it a good thing.

To end, I love your enthusiasm! It comes through in your writing and to become awesome you will have to really develop your inner editor. You know the part of you that says this could be better if I did this instead of that. Drive yourself to develop that editor. It will make you even more awesome.

[Weird Girl]

I do agree that something is a little akward about her positioning but I am not sure I know exactly what it is... maybe her head needs to be raised up? I don't mind your shadows as I too like shooting with them but the brightness on the upper beam does distract me. Is there something reddish on her jeans or is that just me? Overall, this is an awesome start to becoming great. I can tell you really want to learn which is exactly how I am as well. I'm sure you will get more comments with better advice but I did want to let you know I like the photo! You are right, 1/60 is a little low especially if you are hand holding. Her eyes could be a little brighter and clearer but I can't wait to see more!

[Niresangwa]

Well, the standard of work in this critique forum certainly seems to have improved lately, with this shot being another example of it.

I'm going to respectfully disagree with the comments on the composition. You did exactly what I would have chosen to do by using the girders centrally, and leaving her to load one side of the shot. I think you set this one up rather well.

Does she look uncomfortable? sure a little, who wouldn't being balanced on a girder like that, however, it's not the end of the world.

While I like the fall off across her body and through the right side of the frame, it would have been helped immensely with some rim or kicker on the boots/legs fr some separation, but it looks pretty tight back there.

While I can see what's being said with the variable lighting on the girder above her head, it's not a killer, though i would have removed that little rail in the bottom left corner of the shot.

All in all it's a nicely done shot for where you are.

[JFSanders]

Originally Posted by Niresangwa

Well, the standard of work in this critique forum certainly seems to have improved lately, with this shot being another example of it.

I'm going to respectfully disagree with the comments on the composition. You did exactly what I would have chosen to do by using the girders centrally, and leaving her to load one side of the shot. I think you set this one up rather well.

Does she look uncomfortable? sure a little, who wouldn't being balanced on a girder like that, however, it's not the end of the world.

While I like the fall off across her body and through the right side of the frame, it would have been helped immensely with some rim or kicker on the boots/legs fr some separation, but it looks pretty tight back there.

While I can see what's being said with the variable lighting on the girder above her head, it's not a killer, though i would have removed that little rail in the bottom left corner of the shot.

All in all it's a nicely done shot for where you are.

Well of course you would! Being the lover of negative space that you are. And I don't mean that in any negative way. Different strokes for different folks you know. That is the great thing about art and photography. It is without boundaries in most respects. I want Brook to get all the feedback she can so that she will have the opportunity to grow and flourish.

I think your critique is a good one and brings understanding to the image presented.

Jim

[Sime]

I love the two different sides of reply - very cool to hear different folks being, well.. different!

Personally, I quite like the composition - I'd maybe have popped her out from the background a little more with some rim light / hair light maybe? (from underneath, to highlight the end of her hair a bit, maybe?)

But at the same time, totally see where Jim is coming from - two schools of thought, both totally valid.

Good work!

[Niresangwa]

Originally Posted by JFSanders

Well of course you would! Being the lover of negative space that you are. And I don't mean that in any negative way. Different strokes for different folks you know. That is the great thing about art and photography. It is without boundaries in most respects. I want Brook to get all the feedback she can so that she will have the opportunity to grow and flourish.

I think your critique is a good one and brings understanding to the image presented.

Jim

lol thanks Jim..

Good Lord, first of all the much improved standard of work, now we're respectfully disagreeing and happy to do so... maybe the Mayan's are onto something

Originally Posted by Sime

I love the two different sides of reply - very cool to hear different folks being, well.. different!

Personally, I quite like the composition - I'd maybe have popped her out from the background a little more with some rim light / hair light maybe? (from underneath, to highlight the end of her hair a bit, maybe?)

But at the same time, totally see where Jim is coming from - two schools of thought, both totally valid.

Good work!

I think you're right about the where the second light would work.. ideally a simple subject-blocked back light but there doesnt seem to be any room back there... but underneath facing directly up could be really interesting....

[graciousness]

What is this - you can all disagree and be civil at the same time??!? I'd call the police.

Well let me bring balance back to the force by saying you are all wrong. This photo would be much improved if she had no clothes on.

[JFSanders]

Originally Posted by graciousness

What is this - you can all disagree and be civil at the same time??!? I'd call the police.

Well let me bring balance back to the force by saying you are all wrong. This photo would be much improved if she had no clothes on.

You would be correct in that! But I did make a boob reference in my original response.