More NewSoftbox Fun

[Qbert-PNS]

Took this shot of the National Flight Academy's Ops Officer in Pensacola Today. They asked me to shoot their new Command Board (CO, XO so on.) Took some lessons last night and paid attention to comments. Would like a critique on lighting for this one and composition. The Ops O is 3 ' in fornt of a carrier mural. I used my Metz Flash to light up the background.
Thank you for your comments.

EXIF:
Camera Model Canon EOS DIGITAL REBEL XT
Shooting Date/Time 4/7/2011 1:23:26 PM
Shooting Mode Manual Exposure
Tv( Shutter Speed ) 1/125
Av( Aperture Value ) 5.6
Metering Mode Partial Metering
ISO Speed 100
Lens 70.0 - 300.0 mm
Focal Length 95.0 mm
Image Quality RAW
Flash Off Remote Triger
White Balance Mode Auto
AF Mode One-Shot AF
Parameters Settings Contrast Mid. High
Sharpness Mid. High
Color saturation Mid. High
Color tone 0
Color Space sRGB
Noise Reduction Off
Drive Mode Single shooting

[kevingeary]

I like to keep it short and sweet with no sugar coating. Just keep that in mind.

1. Background looks fake. In this instance, the real thing would be much better. If that's not possible, something else real would have worked better.

2. The crop is too tight. For an editorial type portrait, we need to see more of the scene that this person is a part of. Additionally, this guy is supposed to be authoritative but his wardrobe is completely the opposite; way too casual.

3. He's too square to the lens...kinda boring. I would have turned him a little and then shot up at him from a low angle to make him look bigger and tougher and added to the authoritative position he holds.

4. His smile is forced and probably unnecessary. A sterner pose with his eyes a little more open probably would have done the trick.

5. The lighting fell short in terms of drama. It's flat and lacks character, which is exactly what this concept needed to work well. Don't forget to put a light behind the subject to help separate them from the background. Or a hair light at minimum. I'd start experimenting with some cross lighting as it's a simple way to get more drama (see below).


Focus by kevingeary, on Flickr

[MrJones]

+1 on the fake feel of the background.
the lightning on the model is very different than the one in the background which gives that feeling.

[Qbert-PNS]

Thanks for the comments.

This was just a test shot. I thought 'Id post it and get some better eyes on it. We'll tweak and find a different back drop.

Thanks again.

[greenroomsessions]

One thing that I noticed is it looks like the tail of one of the jets is coming out of his head.

[Bruce A]

I agree with all of the above and I would have tightened the shot further to a head and shoulders shot (albeit at a different angle) as I find his partial arms distracting. In agreeance with Kevin, there is nothing about the man to suggest he has anything to do with the military - he could be a tourist or anyone - at least to the untrained eye. However I think the idea was quite worthy.