Girl in NY Diner - how is the composition?

[lotteotte]

I would appreciate some feedback on the composition. Is the woman outside in the left too much (this being a pretty chatty picture already) - should I cut her out? Should I cut out the sky in the left corner and perhaps the hand in the right ? Also, my daughter - once again - makes a bored face, but that's the way pre-teens just look. What does the expression do to you? Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings.

From Lily

NIKON D40
ISO: 280
Exposure: 1/125 sec
Aperture: 5.6
Focal Length: 18mm

[CaptivatedByBeauty]

That picture reminds me of a street scene in Takaka, here in New Zealand. A beautiful spot, full of interest & colour.

Street Furniture - Rubbish Bins | Captivated By Beauty

My answer would be, it's a great pictures, full of interest, colour etc.
IMO it would be better without the hand on the right, but cropping that out would make it worse, so the hand is "street furniture" you can't be rid of (unless you can clone it out).

Without the woman and the hand, I think it would be superb. Maybe cropped a little lower to remove the sky would make it feel more 'inside'/enclosed, and keep the eye on the face and surroundings.

Just an odd thought, what about an oval crop to remove the woman's face and the hand and the sky, but leaving everything else?

Something like this:



I've picked the wood panel colour, but, who knows....

[lotteotte]

Originally Posted by CaptivatedByBeauty

That picture reminds me of a street scene in Takaka, here in New Zealand. A beautiful spot, full of interest & colour.

Street Furniture - Rubbish Bins | Captivated By Beauty

My answer would be, it's a great pictures, full of interest, colour etc.
IMO it would be better without the hand on the right, but cropping that out would make it worse, so the hand is "street furniture" you can't be rid of (unless you can clone it out).

Without the woman and the hand, I think it would be superb. Maybe cropped a little lower to remove the sky would make it feel more 'inside'/enclosed, and keep the eye on the face and surroundings.

Just an odd thought, what about an oval crop to remove the woman's face and the hand and the sky, but leaving everything else?

Something like this:



I've picked the wood panel colour, but, who knows....

Wow - thanks SO MUCH for your ideas and suggestions, Steve, I am very grateful! And I will definitely try them all out. Got to go sleep now here in New York, but your kind comment will definitely give me sweet dreams, probably of New Zealand

[CaptivatedByBeauty]

Originally Posted by lotteotte

Wow - thanks SO MUCH for your ideas and suggestions, Steve, I am very grateful! And I will definitely try them all out. Got to go sleep now here in New York, but your kind comment will definitely give me sweet dreams, probably of New Zealand

No worries
Please dream of a nice quiet stable NZ, we really need one

[BigFuzzy]

Originally Posted by lotteotte

I would appreciate some feedback on the composition. Is the woman outside in the left too much (this being a pretty chatty picture already) - should I cut her out? Should I cut out the sky in the left corner and perhaps the hand in the right ? Also, my daughter - once again - makes a bored face, but that's the way pre-teens just look. What does the expression do to you? Thanks for sharing your thoughts and feelings.

Hi Lotteotte,
Yeah, I think you should crop out the woman.. I think it would add to the atmosphere if you weren't sure what the girl were looking at and with the woman, you think you know.

I also agree the hand should be cropped out. I don't think removing them would be bad and if you cropped I don't think you'd ruin the image.

In the end, I just wish it were less busy. The focus should be on the girl and right now, as you mentioned, with all the detail in the image, she's a bit lost. Shame you couldn't shoot with a longer mm and wider aperture to introduce some DoF.

In the end, it's a nice image that loses a bit due to it being so busy. Also, no offense Steve, but please please don't do the oval crop/vignette thing as, to me, it makes it feel very 80's.. i feel the same about white vignette. IF you want to do anything, introduce a slight (please empasize SLIGHT) amount of dark vignetting as it'll help focus the viewers attention more to the middle/girl.. but if your vignette is too strong, it will actually draw the eye to the vignette.. so be careful!

[CaptivatedByBeauty]

Originally Posted by BigFuzzy

Also, no offense Steve, but please please don't do the oval crop/vignette thing as, to me, it makes it feel very 80's.. i feel the same about white vignette. IF you want to do anything, introduce a slight (please empasize SLIGHT) amount of dark vignetting as it'll help focus the viewers attention more to the middle/girl.. but if your vignette is too strong, it will actually draw the eye to the vignette.. so be careful!

I thought my suggestion/example would create that reaction

There's nothing wrong with the 80's. You know there's a remake of Hawaii-Five-O?
Hawaii Five-0 - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Like clothing fashion, photography seems to also go through fashions. I've never followed fashions, and do what I think looks nice to me. I know others will have their own opinions.
And in 20 years time people will probably be looking at photography done now and say "that's so 2011", so old fashioned, and "What were they thinking back then?"

[CaptivatedByBeauty]

By the way, I'm not sure what is "out of fashion" these days. Are oval frames OK?

Would this be OK on a wall?

[LeeR]

I've seen that look on all of the teenagers I've raised. The real irony is the festive colors juxtaposed against the gloomy expression on the young lady. Composition? Not great, but a lot of compositional mistakes will be overlooked if you catch that magic moment.

[sk66]

I would definitely crop it.

[graciousness]

Oh good god, a big NO on that oval framing. It's a bit........sorry....I have to say it........tacky.

Just play around with all the possible cropping you can do and pick out what you feel is best.

The woman is distracting and if you can find a way to remove, take her out. Yeah, a little black (and I mean minor) vignetting on the edges would do much better than the oval framing. The black vignette will centralise the focus on your daughter.

The hand doesn't bother me so much. The vignette will also sort that out if you try it.

Other than that, I love the photo. Great eye for seeing this candid photo op