Is "e-friendship" real?

[Marija]

Maybe the "e-friendship" isn't a good expression but I couldn't come up with any other word.
Here are my thoughts....
This is the first forum on a web site that I'm relatively active in, I don't spend much time on the Internet so maybe that's way I'm confused a little bit I'm here for learning about photography and I found the forum more useful than articles.... (unfortunately the Internet is my only source of learning)
However, during this few months I've noticed (both the pros and the amateurs) :
- some regular posters here,
- people who give great advices and explanations,
- polite ones and not polite ones
- "thanks for sharing" posters (those who spend the most time in "Share your shots" section, and you can recognize them in other sections because of their "thanks for sharing" post)
- and some people who you'll meet from time to time in some discussions and realize that you have similar opinions
- etc.
Off course, I find it very pleasant when I "meet" someone who shares similar opinions, is polite and ready to help and I'm excited when I got some good critique...all the good things...
On the other hand (this is actually the reason why I posted this question) recently, I've noticed that one regular poster here lied. After that I don't "respect" him. Ok, off course, there are people who lie...but the thing is that I had real emotions when I realized that the person lied!
Are my emotions "normal"?Or, am I too sensitive? They are normal if you found out that someone lies in real life. But, here, I didn't meet the person, we've just talked here, on the Internet.
Has anyone reacted similar as I did? What do you think about real emotions caused by the person on the Internet?

[Jim Poor]

There are very very few "E-relationships" that I would consider real. Those have been built over a LONG period of time with correspondence & advice exchanged via more than just the open forum. There are a few E-friends that I hope to meet someday in the real world.

Yes, you're being too sensitive if you are getting emotional about folks on a forum.

[RLucas]

Originally Posted by Marija

Maybe the "e-friendship" isn't a good expression but I couldn't come up with any other word.
Here are my thoughts....
This is the first forum on a web site that I'm relatively active in, I don't spend much time on the Internet so maybe that's way I'm confused a little bit I'm here for learning about photography and I found the forum more useful than articles.... (unfortunately the Internet is my only source of learning)
However, during this few months I've noticed (both the pros and the amateurs) :
- some regular posters here,
- people who give great advices and explanations,
- polite ones and not polite ones
- "thanks for sharing" posters (those who spend the most time in "Share your shots" section, and you can recognize them in other sections because of their "thanks for sharing" post)
- and some people who you'll meet from time to time in some discussions and realize that you have similar opinions
- etc.
Off course, I find it very pleasant when I "meet" someone who shares similar opinions, is polite and ready to help and I'm excited when I got some good critique...all the good things...
On the other hand (this is actually the reason why I posted this question) recently, I've noticed that one regular poster here lied. After that I don't "respect" him. Ok, off course, there are people who lie...but the thing is that I had real emotions when I realized that the person lied!
Are my emotions "normal"?Or, am I too sensitive? They are normal if you found out that someone lies in real life. But, here, I didn't meet the person, we've just talked here, on the Internet.
Has anyone reacted similar as I did? What do you think about real emotions caused by the person on the Internet?

To me a bond is a bond, no matter what form it takes. If someone you formed a bond with, no matter if it was only over the internet, or in person, wronged you in some way, the emotion is the same. It's how you deal with it that you will have to work out on your own. I do believe what you are feeling is perfectly normal. You have to remember, even though most people tend to hide behind an avatar of some sort, they still are real people, with real emotions, and an ego in some cases.

[hibou]

I have real e-friends, but not here

I think your reaction is perfectly normal. Lying is lying, whether on the internet or IRL. I don't consider the Internet an emotion-free zone devoid of the logic/consequences/reactions of real life, and I pretty much think that people who do take that angle ("it doesn't matter, it's just the internet!") are sociopaths.

[Jim Poor]

Definitely not an "emotion free zone" but those who readily "bond" with someone over the net, especially in a forum like this where there is no control over registration and identity, are being naive at the least.

[dcclark]

Agreed, I have very few "e-friends". People are generally much more free about expressing their thoughts over the internet, which also means that people end up being much more rude / condescending / mean / etc.. It's hard NOT to take that personally, but you've got to work at developing that thicker skin. That said, that's one of the reasons that I have so few e-friends.

[Marija]

Originally Posted by Jim Poor

Yes, you're being too sensitive if you are getting emotional about folks on a forum.

Originally Posted by dcclark

It's hard NOT to take that personally, but you've got to work at developing that thicker skin.

I'm sensitive about lying and I do need thicker skin

Originally Posted by RLucas

To me a bond is a bond, no matter what form it takes. If someone you formed a bond with, no matter if it was only over the internet, or in person, wronged you in some way, the emotion is the same. It's how you deal with it that you will have to work out on your own. I do believe what you are feeling is perfectly normal. You have to remember, even though most people tend to hide behind an avatar of some sort, they still are real people, with real emotions, and an ego in some cases.

I agree with what you've said. I'm a person who tries to be honest every day, in real life or on the Internet. I'm even using my real name here...I'm not pretending to be someone else or hide behind my computer and I expect everyone to be honest (like a child, I know). At least, Isn't it easier for some people to be honest behind avatar?

Originally Posted by hibou

Lying is lying, whether on the internet or IRL..... and I pretty much think that people who do take that angle ("it doesn't matter, it's just the internet!") are sociopaths.

Yes,lying is lying!
Maybe too strict but maybe true

[junglebear]

This is the first (and probably only) forum that I've used, I wouldn't really regard anyone I've met here a friend. I really enjoy chatting on here and sharing photos, critiques and comments, and I've come to look out for posts of certain people who I identify with, but that's about as far as it goes for me. Also the fact that most people on here live in different continents doesn't make the prospect of meeting up very realistic.

But I would say that this is still a form of social interaction and don't see why typical human emotions shouldn't come to the surface, albeit not as strong emotions as if it were a 'real person'.

[RLucas]

I use my real name as well. As far as being easier to to tell the truth behind an avatar? I am not so sure. I think this is where the ego comes in, and the real insecurities start to show. It may or may not still be truth. I am not going to go as far as Hibou and say it's sociopathic, but I do agree with her in general.

[milosh]

I think that what you felt is perfectly normal. A bond, trust, or a relationship is always the same, no matter what medium of communication you use. It's just like 50 years ago when people used to send letters to each other, only faster.
There are always different kinds of people on internet, some are here to be honest and learn, and some use it to feed their complexes. I think that answer to your question about your sensitivity depends on the exact situation/case and your personality, for example someone wouldn't be bothered with those feelings and someone would take it even more seriously.