Misbehaved kids...any thoughts?

[valleygirl]

I am not sure how to handle this, but the last few customers I've had come for portraits have had extremely poorly behaved children. This is to the point that almost all of the family pictures I took have the kids either sticking out their tongue, hitting each other, pulling hair or making raspberries at the camera. I try my best with my little tricks but these kids have just been downright uncooperative. The parents get frustrated and can't seem to control what is going on. Today the father couldn't take it anymore and practically got up and left before we were done.

So my question is, how much of this is my responsibility to try and control? Not being my children, I feel there is only so much I can do. I tell them I've blocked off two hours and that we can take our time, but they always want to take the pictures and run and then expect me to get something good with the kids are misbehaved.

Ugh. So frustrated.

[maxharvard]

My favorite thing to do is to tell the parents to control their kids before we begin. Then just wait until they do it.

[KodiakStar]

Tazer?

If they are young enough, maybe have some candy, or those cheap little toys like they have at the dentist office for kids. "If you behave after we take these pictures you can have 2 toys..." or something to that effect

[valleygirl]

Originally Posted by KodiakStar

Tazer?

If they are young enough, maybe have some candy, or those cheap little toys like they have at the dentist office for kids. "If you behave after we take these pictures you can have 2 toys..." or something to that effect

LOL! Actually, I did have a huge bowl of Halloween candy and told them they could each have two pieces if they did a good job. Didn't help. Parents promised McDonalds. Didn't help. I just feel like there won't be any decent pictures and they are going to blame me. The pictures themselves are gorgeous. It's the expressions on the faces that are a problem. I even shot over 500 pics!

[naeno]

Try to turn it into a game with the kids. Play the "If you can hear me" game. (If you can hear me, pat your head, if you can hear me stick out your tongue). You can get them to put their hands in laps, or any other position fairly easily that way. Also, sing to them. A little, "If You're Happy and You Know It" goes a long way. Children respond quickly to fun. Make it as fun as possible.

[valleygirl]

Originally Posted by naeno

Try to turn it into a game with the kids. Play the "If you can hear me" game. (If you can hear me, pat your head, if you can hear me stick out your tongue). You can get them to put their hands in laps, or any other position fairly easily that way. Also, sing to them. A little, "If You're Happy and You Know It" goes a long way. Children respond quickly to fun. Make it as fun as possible.

Sadly, I played the stick out your tongue game, and then they stuck out their tongue the whole time. The games didn't work at all. I tried "make a funny face then give me a happy face," we sang songs, talked about Halloween, etc. To be honest, the dad was the worst of all of them...he kept asking when he could leave. It was unbelievable. I should add, these were not babies...these were bigger kids.

[maxharvard]

Originally Posted by laurenfitz

LOL! Actually, I did have a huge bowl of Halloween candy and told them they could each have two pieces if they did a good job. Didn't help. Parents promised McDonalds. Didn't help. I just feel like there won't be any decent pictures and they are going to blame me. The pictures themselves are gorgeous. It's the expressions on the faces that are a problem. I even shot over 500 pics!

Bribing kids never works. It's a temporary fix to a bigger issue: I.E. The parents need to be in control. Period.

[valleygirl]

Originally Posted by maxharvard

Bribing kids never works. It's a temporary fix to a bigger issue: I.E. The parents need to be in control. Period.

I'm with you 100%. But it's hard for me to have the guts to say, "look, you are going to be very unhappy with these pictures if you don't control your children." I tell people that I block off 2 hours for their session. If they only have 45 minutes and expect me to get good shots when their kids are defiant, I don't think I should take the blame for that.

I know the customer is always right, but how do I deal with this when mom says she hates the pictures?

[maxharvard]

Originally Posted by laurenfitz

I'm with you 100%. But it's hard for me to have the guts to say, "look, you are going to be very unhappy with these pictures if you don't control your children." I tell people that I block off 2 hours for their session. If they only have 45 minutes and expect me to get good shots when their kids are defiant, I don't think I should take the blame for that.

I know the customer is always right, but how do I deal with this when mom says she hates the pictures?

In my line of work I have no problem telling the parents that their children are little monsters.

The simple question, "Is this how you want your kids to behave? How about when they are older? Is this good behavior as an adult?" usually gets good results

You shouldn't take the blame for it, it's their kids, they should blame themselves for not getting their kids in line for the pictures.

Oh, and one last thing... The customer does not always have to be right. I've asked plenty of unruly little ankle biters to leave my office because i need to "talk" with the parents.

[SandeeWig]

How about a sign hanging in your studio (assuming you're in the studio, not outdoors, etc.) that reads:

Uncontrolled Children = Uncontrolled Portraits

...or something like that. Then you don't have to actually say it.

A nice large example hanging next to it wouldn't hurt either!