Origami

[siopaopei]

i did some post processing on this shot but not too much. just darkened it a little. critique will be appreciated, thanks.

[wulf]

What were you aiming to achieve? It looks like an interesting place to take photos but I find the lack of sharpness detracts from the image and, as I try to look beyond that, I start to ask other questions like "why is the wing tip cut off on the right" rather than being drawn in by fascination with the subject and how it is presented.

Wulf

[siopaopei]

yeah, i wish i took more time to pick my angle. i left in a hurry and didn't notice that i had unintentionally left out a portion of the wing next time, I'll try to focus more so that the image of the origami is sharper. thanks wulf! peace out.

[ELAY]

Great concept. Won't comment on the wing, as I am a repeat offender when it comes to photographic amputation.

After appreciating the subject, my thought on first viewing this photo is that the slightly out of focus origami objects in the background are a bit distracting. I think you might be better off trying for a shallower depth of field out of camera (if you can, don't know what camera you are firing) or by blurring in post, or alternatively shooting with a smaller aperture to get more consistent focus throughout.

EL

[siopaopei]

thank you for the suggestions, ELAY, will try that out when i get the chance to take another similar shot.

[geotography]

Pao,

Great start! I am with Elay, the objects in the background clutter the image. Are you the Origami artist? I like the black background so I would continue with that. I, personally, do not care much for the string in the photo. If you elect to experiment with the no-string idea, you could use black string and contrast it out or attach a support from behind that would not be in view. My idea for dissappearing the string is that the piece would appear to be hanging in space, and hopefully have a simple elegance to it. My last suggestion, would be to experiment with other vibrant colors that would look good against the black background. Oh yes, it could be crisper and more focused. Nice subject. I look forward to your continued work on this piece.

Best,

[siopaopei]

thanks for the critique and encouragement, geotography. unfortunately i can't adjust anything with the setting of the photo because i only passed by it in my old university. i'll keep your suggestions for future compositions. thanks!