Buy a 50mm f1.8 lens...great low light lens, good DOF, and a classic for portraits.
Or buy a flash that can bounce, but I agree the flash sometimes can just distract the children.
Best of luck
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Nikon D40,Nikon S550, Nikkor DX 18-55, Nikkor DX 55-200
CS3 for all Post Work
RAW is wonderful
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