[olgabe]

Sounds like you have a relationship problem going on there, more so than the gear maintenance problem.
Having said that - I would not treat my equipment this way, but... I remember my ex-bf near fainting when he saw me stuffing my DSLR into a purse for a daytrip. He was convinced it's gear abuse. Cameras belong in camera bags, not purses. I think that as long as there are no sharp objects in the purse, there is nothing wrong with that.
I also consider my UV filters dispensable, I keep the lens cap off whenever the camera is out of the bag - even if it's sitting in the car passenger seat. I buy filters so that I don't have to worry about scratching my glass. Some people think it's abuse as well. A lot of it is a matter of opinion!

I would not buy him any gifts in this category though if I don't think he is appreciating them.