Ok, then try dialing it down to -2EV, and seeing if that works for you. Otherwise, the only other way I can think of to cut the power down is to stick neutral density gels over the pop-up.
I'd also make sure that you're not overexposing the ambient. Take a picture without the flash, but using the same iso/aperture/shutter speed. It should be dark or black. If it's also overexposed, then you want to adjust those setting first, before adding flash.
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