Landing Lights

[RussHeath]

So I haven't posted in critique since we changed the format. I've been processing some more photos from my November trip to Bosque del Apache, and I keep coming back to this one. I feel like it's not quite right, and I was hoping some fresh eyes could help me tweak it a little:

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2192/2239010695_425bb65c7a.jpg (http://www.flickr.com/photos/russheath/2239010695/)


EXIF:
1/50, f/14, 800mm (400mm lens with 2x teleconverter), ISO 100.

The original was shot in RAW, and this is not cropped, just converted to JPEG and I played with the color and contrast a bit.

My specific questions are:
--What do you think about composition? Would a different crop be better? I don't have any room to work on the edges, but I feel like I can't quite place what is "off" in this one.

--How is the contrast? It's naturally close to monotone being shot at sunset with almost a silhouette look, but do the two birds in flight pop enough? If not, any suggestions to bringing them out would be appreciated. Everything I've tried makes them look pasted in (selectively increasing brightness or contrast) or noisy (selectively sharpening).

Any and all other comments and critiques are greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

[jiminyClickit]

newbie,

I feel your pain (that's my best Bill Clinton impression).

First, terrific post. Second, are you wondering if the horizon should be level, or that foreground Sun/water reflection? I haven't looked at a rotated version, so I can't say.

Are the bird-shaped black images near center right, birds? I see why they're impotant, and why they're blobs, just an issue of "They caught my attention."

Part of what I like most is the misty Sun-in-eyes quality of the subject birds. Again, not sure what higher contrast would do.

I'd say you could put several versions up and get a consensus. Then use what looks best to you.

Second look: I could see cropping right side and bottom, same ratio, to put birds in diagonal and hit thirds with waterline.

[RussHeath]

Thanks for the ideas, Jiminy. First, I had not noticed the tilted horizon, because the bright sunlight reflections off the water looked straight. As I tried to fix the horizon by rotating the image, it made everything else look tilted because those sunny highlights are so prominent. So I used the cloning tool and built myself just enough horizon to have it be straight. Here is the edit, I think it's an improvement:


http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2384/2241412956_9058be0d9d.jpg (http://www.flickr.com/photos/russheath/2241412956/)

You were correct that the black blobs were other birds. I took your second suggestion of cropping out the bottom right and cloned out the remaining two birds in the shot. This actually turned out to be fairly difficult, as all those horizontal lines just don't want to line up. I used the smudge tool to fix the edges of where I cloned:

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2273/2241414218_8305f7ec87.jpg (http://www.flickr.com/photos/russheath/2241414218/)

I think it's less cluttered and makes the two birds in flight more prominent.

Thanks again for the thoughts, if you have others let me know and I'll give it another try!

[jiminyClickit]

newbie,

Unless or until I edit, I can't be certain a suggestion will help a photo. So this is a pleasure to see, because of your vision. You did a good job bringing your subject into prominence, without obvious excesses.

[RussHeath]

newbie,

Unless or until I edit, I can't be certain a suggestion will help a photo. So this is a pleasure to see, because of your vision. You did a good job bringing your subject into prominence, without obvious excesses.

Thanks very much. This was one of those photos that I had stared at over and over again, but couldn't see what was bothering me because I was no longer being objective about it. Your critique was just what it needed!

[jiminyClickit]

newbie,

You're welcome. I'm honored, glad to offer another view.