Wow, I hope she wasn't one of your good friends.
I can kind of relate. My cousin-in-law (sounds like a distant relation but we are about the same age and see each other a bit) is a casual photographer and we like to talk about the subject. Luckily it doesn't usually get into individual critiques of each other's photographs. I think we both want to avoid any awkward situations. The biggest mistake your friend made was assuming that you want to make the same type of photographs that she makes. Photography is a highly personal hobby and each person is trying their best to create their own vision of things. If she wants to make here contrasty, blown out portraits (and I think I know exactly what style your talking about) great. If you like your pictures a little darker and more evenly exposed, super.
Hope your venting made you feel better