At my wife's grandfather's funeral I was asked to take some photos. I felt really disrespectful, but I think there are times when you can take the picture and not disturb anyone. If you can take a picture at the viewing before anyone arrives, I think that's fine. Pictures of the pallbearers can be done without people noticing too much. If it is a military funeral like the one I did, then the color guard is good as well.
What I learned. Take the pictures when no one is around. During the events that need to be captured when people are there, use a telephoto lens, and stay far enough away that no one really notices you. If you are requested to, take pictures during the service from the back, quietly, and remember, no flash.
In retrospect, none of the pictures do much for anyone. As my wife says, it's not him, it doesn't look like him anymore. So if asked again, I would politely refuse, and explain why.
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